So anyway, I made a comment on a news story. It got 54 responses. Some of them were supportive. Some were intellectually debating my comment (from whale experts I'm certain). Some were downright rude. They insulted me personally. They made comments about my profile picture. These strangers from all across the country clicked my picture, read the small part of my Facebook bio that is public and formed an opinion of me based on that tiny insight into my life. Some didn't even go that far. They just read my comment and hated me for no reason other than my opinion.
I laughed it off. I don't care what those people think of me. But it took a minute of prayer and self reflection to get to the laughing. I had to realize that I had put myself out there. I left a comment that sparked anger on some sides and support on others. There are people out there that never leave their homes and they sit and wait to pounce on what people put out there. I feel bad for these people but I guess I set myself up for their enjoyment.
Social media has changed our lives more than we ever thought that it could. I remember building my MySpace profile. It was new and exciting. I had been out of high school for about 5 years and hadn't seen some of my old friends in that time. MySpace brought them back into my life. I could see what they were up to. It wasn't really that detailed, just a small insight into their lives. A couple years later I finally converted to the Facebook world and Facebook shoved these friends down my throat.
Think about how it has changed us. Why should I go to a reunion when I know what you had for lunch yesterday. Why do I need to send you a Christmas card when you can see pics of my kids every other day, every single time you pick up your phone? Letters??? -- forget it. Phonecalls? -- most definitely not. I love a lot about it, too. I keep up with friends and family that I do truly miss and care about. I have developed online friendships that have turned into true real-life friendships. The good kind of balances the bad for now.
It's the opinions that bother me. I think we are more likely to be opinionated and downright rude to people because a screen and a few hundred miles separate us. I mean I wouldn't sit in a room at a party with a thousand people I kind of know and state my opinion on a polarizing subject and sit back and watch the chaos. I wouldn't tear someone down for stating their opinion in person-- why should I feel like I have that right via the internet?
I love a good intellectual debate. I can argue with the best of them. I don't like it when I'm proven wrong, but that's part of it too. I love politics and religion and all sorts of other stuff and I love that I can connect with people that I wouldn't normally hear from, and get their opinions and even be educated by them on subjects that I might not know that much about (eg. whales). The thing that I have to remember is that I value those friendships more than I value being right. I can step down from an argument in order to save a friendship.
And boy have I gotten into downright arguments with people that I used to be friends with because of some political, religious, or whale-like issue on Facebook. They state their opinion - fine. I state mine - fine. We go back and forth like civil adults - fine. We start insulting each other personally because we can't agree -- wrong. Words matter. Even typed words matter (and typed words are harder to take back). (Again, thank you for the block button.)
I know I've been rambling this morning but I think that we need to step back and remember that there's a person on the other side of the world looking at her computer. She's probably a wonderful person and she probably doesn't know that much about whales. She's probably just up late and bored. You don't know her; or maybe you knew her 15 years ago, but she's probably a whole different person now. She doesn't know you either.
"Hatred stirs up conflicts, but love covers all offenses."
Proverbs 10:12
