Sometimes you just need to ask for help.
Y’all I’ve been struggling about my house in the past 6 months. I’m talking embarrassed to have company struggling. I’m talking telling people I’m not home and hiding in the bedroom, struggling.
Only close family have been in my home... and only they have entered unannounced when it seemed to me my home was at its absolute worst.
I’m not a homemaker. I don’t love to clean. I don’t want to spend every minute I have cooking and cleaning up my family’s mess. That’s just not me.
When I was working full time i had an angel of a housekeeper. She worked from the time she walked through my door until the time she walked out and she was wonderful and I LOVED her.
The other thing about me is that I get attached.
When I decided to take time to stay at home I let my housekeeper go. I missed her every single Thursday but she moved on. She found new, easier houses to clean. And when I started working again, she didn’t need me anymore.
So I sucked it up and convinced myself I could do it all. I could work and clean and do laundry and cook supper on my days off or bring
supper home on my workdays. I’m super woman and I’m able to provide for my family.
I was wrong.
My housework suffered.
My family’s meals suffered (there’s only a set number of times that you can pass off KFC as a “home cooked meal”)
My family suffered (there was a laundry emergency that coincided with a toilet paper shortage.... I don’t need to get into details but let’s suffice it to say that neither would have happened when stay at home mom Heather was here)
I suffered. I had anxiety and depression and anger and fear about the state of my housekeeping. I thought about it all the time. I dreamed about it. I had nightmares about people dropping In unannounced.
I fought it for a long time. I was determined to handle it all by myself. I was determined that I was a good enough wife and mother that I could do it all without help.
I was wrong.
I asked for help..... paid help.... but help none the less.
My helper showed up today and she cleaned and cleaned and cleaned and she never not one time made me feel like I was less. She never implied that I was less of a mother, wife, woman... she just showed up and cleaned. She washed all the crevices in my cabinets, she got on her knees and cleaned floor boards. She made everything look new again (or as new again as was possible).
The moral of this story is that sometimes you have to admit that you need help. We all love to believe that we are super women but sometimes we need another superwoman to come in and help us get back on track.
The same goes for our Christian lives.... we can coast along when all is well and pray our prayers and pay our tithes but when all the things go wrong in our lives and we are struggling with our r dirty house what do we do??? Do we ignore our problems and hope they will go away? Do we struggle in silence and pray that our friends don’t find out how messy our hearts are? Do we put dust covers over our sins and expect all our church friends to sit on the plastic when they come to visit?
Jesus is my help. He is my soul’s housekeeper. He knows my messiest part. He knows when my heart is dirty and he rejoiced when my heart is clean. He sees right through that plastic and loves me anyway. If you don’t know that love and forgiveness I implore you to talk to me, message me. Cause no matter how messy or dirty you think you are, Jesus will be your savior, he will be your house keeper, he will clean up all the dirty corners in your heart and he will make you feel new again.
“But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you.” John 14:26
