33 Things Worth Remembering in 33 Years

33 years. It's hard for me to believe. 33 seemed old when I was a kid. It was almost unreachable. Now here I am with three kids, one who's taller than I am now. I feel like time is slipping through my hands. When they were little the days were so long and I longed for some time just to sit and think.... now it seems I have more and more quiet times and I miss their toddler giggles.

I am 33 today. And I guess I'm a little sad.

So since it's my birthday I've been thinking all day about stuff that I've learned and things that I want to teach my children. They will roll their eyes if I read this to them now. So why not make a list and leave it here in cyberspace for future reference. Maybe one day they'll look me up and read what I write and it will make more sense to them. Happy birthday to me. Here's 33 things that I've learned were important in my 33 years....

1.  Listen to your mother. My mother is usually right about stuff. She'll love this one, but it's true. She told me not to take my whole allowance to school in the 7th grade (I ignored her and my wallet got stolen). She told me to dress like a lady and not wear the black lacy bra under the white button up shirt (I ignored her and ended up pregnant). She's told me many things about raising my own children and although I still hate to admit it, she's usually right.
2. Answer the phone when your grandmother calls. Even if you are in the season of life that makes you think that you don't have time to talk to a crazy old lady... No One is THAT busy. Stop what you are doing and talk to the woman who loves you more than anything else in her world. She won't be there forever. You'll desperately want to talk to her one day and she won't be there to answer.
3. Read to you children while they are young enough to love it. This is another one of those things that Mama told me to do. See number one. I'm on my last baby now. She still lets me read, but she's learning to take the book away and read on her own. I do the voices better. I like to hear her giggle. 
4. Nothing good happens after midnight. Ever. Even as an adult. Come home. It's not worth it, take my word on this.
5. Read your Bible. Even when you don't feel like it. Even when you are tired or you are busy or you feel like you have better things to do. Read it and cherish it. I promise you won't be sorry.
6. Learn to cook. It's not hard and it's not beneath you. It's therapy. It will make you happy to feed your family something that only you can cook. When they refuse someone else's recipe because it's just not like yours, you will be happy.
7. Don't take marriage lightly. It's not always about fairytale love. Marriage is a responsibility. It's a hard job but it is worth the effort. Don't give up on your spouse.
8. To my sons: Respect women. Open doors for them, walk them to their doors, respect their boundaries, treat them like ladies. Take your hat off at the dinner table. 
9. Put the phone down. You are not that important. I am actively trying to work on this and I hope that when my children remember me in their youth they don't remember trying to win my attention away from my cell phone. 
10. Play. Get outside and throw a Frisbee. Play fetch with the dog. Play tag or chase. Make someone giggle.
11. Learn to express yourself. Sing, write, play an instrument... do something that makes you happy and gives you self worth. Take time for yourself and always seek to make yourself a better person.
12. Accept that you are not perfect. You will never be perfect none of us are. There will always be someone out there that does something better than you. Accept that, rise to the challenge, or accept it.
13. Never forget where you came from. Be proud of your home. Never shy away from your roots. People will try to make you feel ashamed of being southern, or country, or back woods. They are wrong. Never let them make you feel ashamed. Be proud.
14. Learn to admit when you are wrong. Do not carry grudges. It's not worth the headache or the anxiety. It's so much more pleasant to get along with people. 
15. Don't post anything on social media unless you want it to follow you for the rest of your life. That includes your snaps and vines and tweets that you think I don't know about now. I know. I'm watching.
16. Love your siblings. They'll be your best friends when you are older. Make time for them now. Make memories together. 
17. Go to church. Even when you don't want to. Even when you stay out too late on Saturday night. Even when you have small children of your own. Even when you are in college or newly married. Find a church and go to church. The church will be your family when your own family is not around. Going to church will keep you centered and focused on where you should take your life. Go to church.
18. Don't procrastinate. It's so much better to plan and have things done on time. Don't wait until the last minute for the school or work project. 
19. Sing at the top of your lungs in the car whenever you can. When you have children they will cry and hold their hands over their ears and beg you to stop. Don't stop. Sing louder.
20. Always keep someone in your life that holds you accountable, that encourages you, that isn't afraid to bring you back to reality. (See number 16.)
21. Self control is important. Be it food or alcohol or work or TV or video games. Learn to tell yourself no and to stop yourself from over indulgence. Everything in moderation. (something I'm still working on)
22. Don't swear. It isn't funny and it certainly isn't cute. It doesn't make you seem cool. It makes you seem shallow and rude and it makes other people uncomfortable. 
23.  Read books. Read the ones your English teachers tell you to read. Read as many of the classics as you can. Never stop reading.
24. Don't rush into physical intimacy. You are young. You only have one first kiss. Don't waste it on some jerk that will make you shudder when you think back on it in the future. Boys don't be the jerk that makes some girl shudder when she thinks back on you. You are very, very, young and no matter what your friends are saying it's not that good when you are a teenager and it is worth it for you to wait until you can share it with your God called partner. 
25. Never get a credit card. NEVER EVER EVER get a credit card. If you don't have the money for it, don't buy it. If you wouldn't ask someone you love to loan you the money for it, you don't need it. If you can go a month without it, you don't need it. Never, ever, get a credit card. 
26. Never use tobacco.Don't smoke it, dip it, or chew it. It's gross in any form.
27. Don't do drugs. They destroy families and they destroy lives. They, too, are gross... I'm paying good money for your dental hygiene... don't smoke something that will mess that up.
28. Get a job that makes you happy. Don't stay in a job that makes you miserable. Seek Godly counsel in your career. However, if you are in a job that you don't like, do it with a joyful heart and always do your best work. 
29. Go to college. I worked through community college with two babies in diapers. There is no excuse for not getting an education. 
30. Take time, every day, and pray. Spend time alone, just you and God and seek His guidance in your life. Prepare yourself to be a witness to others. The time you spend with God every day will help you with this.
31. Get a dog.... or a cat. Always have a companion that depends on you and makes your life better.
32. Be adventurous. Be braver than I have been. Take trips and risks and do crazy stuff that I would never do because I want you to be twice as brave as I ever hoped to be. Just be sure to call me and tell me all about it. 
33. Have cake on your birthday. Make sure your kids always have cake on their birthdays. Make one day a year all about you and make it special every single time.

I'm sure I could think of more. I hope that some of these have already been ingrained in my children's memories. I want to raise happy, healthy, educated, respectful, Christian adults... that's all I want for any of my birthdays. Here's to year 33. 

To the One Snoring in the Recliner :)

there's several things tonight i could blog about....

there's several more things tonight i could rant and rave about...

I actually started a couple and got to about the third or forth line and stopped...

See... the thing I want to blog about isn't a thing.... He's a person. And he's snoring in the recliner just a few feet from where I sit.

Here we are when we were MUCH younger....

He's not a man from some grocery store novel cover... he's the guy you see in the store covered in axle grease on his hands...and a loaf of bread in his hands, because he is stopping by for his wife.
 
He's not a "Christian Grey"... he's the guy that treats her with respect and dignity. He loves her and would never wish to harm her, in any way. He is a gentleman on the street and in the bedroom... he's the man of her dreams.

He's not the guy you see in the bar every night... He's the guy that wants to spend his time away from work with the woman he loves. He's the one that makes sure it's ok with his wife before he goes out of town. He's the one that can't wait to see her when he comes back home.

He's not the guy that is always gone out with his "buds"... He's the guy who's best friend is at home. He's the guy who can't wait to get home to his best friend. He's the one who tells her everything. 

He's not the guy who hangs out with the bad guys... He's the guy that chooses his friends wisely. He picks other men that can give him Godly counsel. His friends are a reflection of who he is.

He's the guy that buys himself expensive toys.... he's also the guy that buys her jewelry or the latest gadget and he freely gives without any expectations of anything in return.
 
He's not the evil stepfather... He's the guy that takes her kids and loves them like his own. He's the guy that makes sure they have the best education and the best clothes and he makes sure that they never feel like they don't belong.

He's the guy that married a family... not just a woman.

He's the guy who loves her above all other things. He's the guy that gets up so early and works so hard that, sometimes, he falls asleep in the recliner. He's the guy that grills when he gets home even if he had a bad day. He's the guy that agrees to disagree whenever the debate gets too intense.

Here we are 10 years later ...and captured by one of those expensive toys... Oh well!

He's her best friend. 

He loves her... despite their differences.... Because of their differences.

He loves her.

And She Loves Him.

And they are happy. :)

 "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." - Ecclesiastes 4:12

The Ghosts of Christmas Past

I packed my Christmas stuff up today. I swear I just got the stuff out of the closet a week ago. Kind of makes me feel bad for trash talking all those crazy Christmas loving friends of mine that break out the decorations a week or two before Thanksgiving.

Anyway... It made me feel sad. 

1985 - I was the curly red head cheesing in the top left.

I remember waking up everyday and knowing exactly how many more sleeps til Christmas morning. I remember making my list and then rethinking my list and making a new list.  I remember my Granny telling me how she saw santa when she was sick on her couch as a little girl. I remember me and my brother hearing the jingle bells. I remember sitting in my daddy's chair and staring at the loads of gifts that santa had brought and wondering how in the world he got all those gifts down the chimney. 

I remember getting a little less excited after I finally realized the truth about Santa. I remember being excited about knowing something my brother didn't. I remember realizing later that my brother knew how to milk the "Last kid that doesn't know about Santa" status so that we all treated him extra special. I remember KNOWING that he knew but being too scared to tell him for sure. 

After my brother found out Christmas became a blur. Years passed and we didn't rush to the tree on Christmas morning anymore. We slept in. We got our presents on Christmas eve instead. Christmas lost it's excitement.

Then my kids came along. Even with the first one, Santa came. My son was 8 months old and I remember panicking because I had fallen asleep after feeding him and had to rush to put the toys out.  Two or three years later and it really started getting fun... I had two kids that totally believed that Santa would put them on the naughty list in an instant. I had the North Pole on speed dial. The kids were petrified and mesmerized at the same time. It was fun to be an elf.

Two little boys kept Santa (me) busy. I loved the tonka trucks and thomas trains and hot wheels tracks that came every year. It was just me and my two boys for a few  Christmasses and those were especially sweet. But slowly the tank engines and tonka trucks turned into Mp3 players and BB guns... shortly after that stuff started to change and Christmas got fast again.

2009 - The Last Year They All Believed

My oldest found out that there wasn't a Santa in 2010. He's such a good brother that he never let his younger brother know. We had two or three more exciting years of AirSoft guns and AirHog Flyers before we had to break it to the middle child. The tooth fairy forgot to come... two nights in a row. The kid was getting a complex. I had to tell him. "So... there's no Easter Bunny either?" was his response.  And then "What about Snoopy? (our elf)" It was rough for the poor middle child.

At least we still had the youngest--Our very own Cindy Lou Who. She is babied by all the family. We've had baby dolls and strollers, play kitchens and play houses, barbie dolls with dream houses, and all the fun girly stuff in between. She's the last believer on her daddy's side of the family. Every adult dotes on her and rubs her curls and asks what Santa's bringing. She gets embarrassed and shrugs and says "I don't know." It makes my heart smile. It also makes me sad.

What happened to those years that her older brothers shrugged and got embarrassed and told the grown-ups that they didn't know what Santa was bringing? What happened to hand written letters to Santa that are now replaced with a digital list? What happened to my babies?

On the same note... What happened to the little curly red head that stayed up as long as she could on Christmas eve listening out for sleigh bells? What happened to the days when me and my brother rushed into our sister's rooms and begged them to get up and open presents? How in the world have the minutes and hours gotten shorter?? Why can't I stop these memories and rewind? When did my world filled with firsts (first steps, first christmas, first tooth) become a world filled with lasts (last baby, last diaper, last kid who believes)?

I pondered these things as I packed it all away again... I carefully placed all the ornaments back in their boxes, tissue in between, so that I can remember Christmas past again next year. I hope I remember to slow down next year. I hope I remember to lay down with my head under the tree and look up at the lights and make my wishes to Santa. I hope I remember to make my kids participate in the "cheezy" family traditions that they act like they hate. I hope I get more pictures. I hope that our minutes don't get any shorter. Or at least that I can remember every second of every minute with these precious souls that God has given me.

2014 They rolled their eyes and fought and complained and giggled and I wouldn't trade this moment for the world!!

***NOTE: Before the hate thoughts... please rest assured that I do teach my kids about Jesus. They know Luke 2 by heart. They also know to believe in things unseen and to have faith and to enjoy the magic of the celebration of Christmas. So... there.... 

Whales Matter... Words Matter Too

A couple of weeks ago I was reading a news article about Sea World's killer whale problem and I made a comment on the Facebook feed stating my opinion on the matter. Now, understand, I am not a whale expert. I watched a documentary about killer whales and I based most of my argument on that. I'm not a Sea World expert either. I haven't ever been. The animals may be treated like kings trapped in giant fish bowls. I don't know. Honestly, I don't really care about it that much. I know I'm supposed to be outraged. The documentary told me I was supposed to be outraged, but, truthfully, my life is full of more important stuff (sorry whales). 

So anyway, I made a comment on a news story. It got 54 responses. Some of them were supportive. Some were intellectually debating my comment (from whale experts I'm certain). Some were downright rude. They insulted me personally. They made comments about my profile picture. These strangers from all across the country clicked my picture, read the small part of my Facebook bio that is public and formed an opinion of me based on that tiny insight into my life. Some didn't even go that far. They just read my comment and hated me for no reason other than my opinion. 

I laughed it off. I don't care what those people think of me. But it took a minute of prayer and self reflection to get to the laughing. I had to realize that I had put myself out there. I left a comment that sparked anger on some sides and support on others. There are people out there that never leave their homes and they sit and wait to pounce on what people put out there. I feel bad for these people but I guess I set myself up for their enjoyment.

Social media has changed our lives more than we ever thought that it could. I remember building my MySpace profile. It was new and exciting. I had been out of high school for about 5 years and hadn't seen some of my old friends in that time. MySpace brought them back into my life. I could see what they were up to. It wasn't really that detailed, just a small insight into their lives.  A couple years later I finally converted to the Facebook world and Facebook shoved these friends down my throat.

Think about how it has changed us. Why should I go to a reunion when I know what you had for lunch yesterday. Why do I need to send you a Christmas card when you can see pics of my kids every other day, every single time you pick up your phone? Letters??? -- forget it. Phonecalls? -- most definitely not. I love a lot about it, too. I keep up with friends and family that I do truly miss and care about. I have developed online friendships that have turned into true real-life friendships. The good kind of balances the bad for now. 

It's the opinions that bother me. I think we are more likely to be opinionated and downright rude to people because a screen and a few hundred miles separate us. I mean I wouldn't sit in a room at a party with a thousand people I kind of know and state my opinion on a polarizing subject and sit back and watch the chaos. I wouldn't tear someone down for stating their opinion in person-- why should I feel like I have that right via the internet?

I love a good intellectual debate. I can argue with the best of them. I don't like it when I'm proven wrong, but that's part of it too. I love politics and religion and all sorts of other stuff and I love that I can connect with people that I wouldn't normally hear from, and get their opinions and even be educated by them on subjects that I might not know that much about (eg. whales). The thing that I have to remember is that I value those friendships more than I value being right. I can step down from an argument in order to save a friendship. 

And boy have I gotten into downright arguments with people that I used to be friends with because of some political, religious, or whale-like issue on Facebook. They state their opinion - fine. I state mine - fine. We go back and forth like civil adults - fine. We start insulting each other personally because we can't agree -- wrong. Words matter. Even typed words matter (and typed words are harder to take back). (Again, thank you for the block button.)

I know I've been rambling this morning but I think that we need to step back and remember that there's a person on the other side of the world looking at her computer. She's probably a wonderful person and she probably doesn't know that much about whales. She's probably just up late and bored. You don't know her; or maybe you knew her 15 years ago, but she's probably a whole different person now. She doesn't know you either.

"Hatred stirs up conflicts, but love covers all offenses."

Proverbs 10:12

First day of school...

We started a new school year today. I'm sure most of you have already gone through this. If you haven't I'm sure you are going to go through it soon. The excitement level varies, I'm sure, with every child, but I was struck at how my own children have changed through the years.

I called up to wake up my oldest child first. His room is closest to mine and I called him on my way to wake up the others. He's 14 now. He's a Freshman in high school. It's a big year for him. He mumbled something after I called him a couple of times and I thought he might be awake. I moved on.

Middle child isn't that difficult. I call to him and he answers. He sits up in bed. I'm pretty sure I see him lay back down out of the corner of my eye before I walk by, but I'm re-insured by his exuberance (compared to the other one) and I move on to the next child.

Youngest child is easy. I gently say her name. I whisper "first day of school" into her sweet tiny ear and she gasps before she opens her eyes. As her eyes pop open she smiles and says "I can't believe it's time for first grade!" She continues as she stands up on the bed, "I'm so excited about the first day of school! I love school! I can't wait to see my teacher!" She hops on the bed. "Mama, get my stripey dress and my pink flip flops! You have to spray my hair. Mama, I can't believe school starts to day. Mama, I'm soooo excited about first grade!" She follows me back down to the kitchen and never stops her monologue.

On the way we call to the Middle Child. "I'm up." is the reply and he seems to be in the process. His legs are on the side of his bed and he is contemplating his shorts.

Next stop is the Oldest... "Wake up!" No answer. "Wake UPPPP!" Nothing. "Mama, do you need me to go jump on him? I'll get him up. I can't believe he's not excited. I'm excited. I can't wait to see my teacher. I can't wait to see my friends. Are you sure you don't want me to--" I interrupt, "WAKE UP! DON'T MAKE ME COME UP THERE! DON'T YOU MAKE US LATE ON THE FIRST DAY BACK!"

Youngest is quiet long enough after my outburst that I hear a thud-a -thump-thud-thump from the upstairs room. This usually means he has emerged from bed or he has fallen out one or the other. I hear him trudge down the stairs to brush his teeth and I am reassured that, whatever the case, he will survive.

We make it to school on time; earlier than I had imagined possible. They all leave me to go to their class rooms. One more year off to a typical start. I have my pictures to prove it to all my friends. I got all three there and they even smiled for a picture.

On the way home I got to thinking about their individual reactions today. It occurred to me that the oldest, the one that had been doing it the longest, was the hardest to get excited this morning. My middle child was reluctant, but he didn't take much prodding to get up and dressed. The youngest was excited. She was ready. She was eager. She hadn't discovered that it isn't cool to be excited about school. She still posed for pictures and hugged her teachers. She was on fire for school. Summer vacation didn't steal her joy. It didn't lure her away from her excitement about school.

Well, this got me to thinking about my own spiritual life (and other peoples spiritual lives). When I got saved I was ON FIRE for Jesus. Much like my youngest was excited about school. I read my Bible every day. I bought a Teen Devos book and read that every day. I studied my Sunday School lesson. I spent time with God in prayer every night and most mornings. I was excited about my new life as a Child of Christ.

Years have passed and as I look back I can see years that I have spent that I was less enthusiastic. Christianity seemed to me like the upper grades seem to my older kids. I wasn't bouncing out of bed on Sunday morning. I went from attending every other Sunday to not attending at all. I went on a spiritual summer vacation...I lost my enthusiasm for Jesus. I was still saved but I had let the world steal my excitement during my break from my church. It was the same with my kids. They all love school but they had let the summer break steal their excitement too. 

It took years for me to get back into a church family after I lost the excitement. Thankfully I have found my way back. The thing is, with the church comes the excitement. Just like when my kids got to school today and they saw all their friends, they came home with stories of their day and what everyone had been up to. I leave church and I am on fire again; just like I was when I was younger. The people encourage me. The people nurture my faith. The pastor leads me. God speaks to me when I am there. I feel his presence. 

Sure, I feel Him in my life other times, but I'm more in tune with Him when I have surrounded myself with people that know Him and crave His presence. I'm more confident to share His good news with people when I have been reaffirmed and reassured in a regular meeting with other believers. 

I guess what I'm saying is don't grow tired of your education in Christ. Remember that first grade feeling, remember that new believer feeling. Remember how you wanted to shout to the rooftops that you were a saved believer in the one true Christ. Keep going to regular meetings with other believers to reaffirm your faith. Keep the joy in your heart. Jesus loves you.... What do you have to be sad about?

 "Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity."

1 Timothy 4:12

21 Years...

21 years... A fraction of a lifetime...a blip on the timeline of a life.

11 years... Even smaller... it passes in a blink of an eye... such a small window of time.

8 years.... Minuscule... so small an amount of time that it might get overlooked in the story of a life... it's the time between graduation and marriage... it's the blip on the radar between the first day at a new job and getting a big promotion ...

All these years mean something to me.

21 years ago I was innocent. 21 years ago I didn't have any fears in my world. 21 years ago my mama and daddy could defeat anything that gave me nightmares. 21 years ago I was a little girl.

21 years ago a guy drank a bottle of whiskey (or a bottle of vodka, or a case of beer) and decided to go for a drive. 21 years ago he thought that he was untouchable. 21 years ago he probably thought that he wasn't that drunk, thought he'd only had a couple. 21 years ago he thought he was fine. 21 years ago he destroyed a community. 21 years ago he killed a girl and a boy. 21 years ago he sent 2 grieving parents to an emergency room. 21 years ago I stopped being a little girl. 

I was 11 years old. It was a Sunday. I had bought all my school supplies. I had a new back pack and a new binder. I can still close my eyes and smell that new binder smell. I sniff a binder today and I am not taken back to a happy childhood memory. New binder smell takes me back to that Sunday evening that changed my life forever. I hate the way that new binders smell.

I had a 3-D binder that year. It was 1993 and 3-D stuff was all the rage. It was pink and it looked like it had bubbles all over it. The bubbles were an optical illusion. Mead really out did themselves in 1993. 

I sat in my living room and tore my new pens and pencils out of their paper and plastic wrappings. I placed them carefully in the slots in my new JanSport back pack. I put the paper in my binder and separated it with subject dividers. I was ready for sixth grade.

It was going to be our big year. We had talked about it all summer. We had hoped and prayed that we would get the same home room. We were ready to start changing classes but we really didn't want to have to do it alone. We were sure that we could tackle anything together. We were going to open house on Monday.

21 years ago I went to my room and played with my Barbie's. We didn't attend church regularly on Sunday nights back then. I happily surrounded myself in my Barbie fantasy land. I was almost too old to enjoy Barbie's. I would have never played with them with my friends around. Never would have played with them around most of my friends. My best friend still liked to play with Barbie's. She and I would comb their hair and change their clothes all the while talking about which boys we liked or which girls had made us mad the week before. 21 years ago we both stopped playing with Barbie Dolls. 

I was playing with Barbie and Mississippi Burning was on Channel 11 that night. The grown up part of my 11 year old self wanted to watch Mississippi Burning. The child part wanted to brush Barbie's hair so I did both. It's weird the things you remember.

There was a knock at my door. I always kept it locked to keep my brother out. I figured it was him. He was the only on that ever knocked. I put Barbie down and stomped to my door. I was surprised when I opened it to see my Daddy.

He was crying. My daddy was crying. I don't think I had ever seen my daddy cry before this night. My mother ushered my brother into my daddy's arms. I looked down the hallway and I see my grandmother crying. I assume that my Papaw is dead. I sniffle and prepare myself for the worst possible news that an 11 year old girl could imagine.

It's not Papaw.... that was the thought that had me relieved and devastated in all of a second.

.....

I don't remember how he said it. I remember him being honest. I remember him crying.... a lot. I remember him saying there had been an accident. I remember him saying that Crystal and CJ were dead. My best friend and her little brother were dead. 

The rest of the night was kind of a blur. I remember someone put Grease 2 on the TV. I laid on the couch, in a fog and saw parts of it. I cried a lot. A few of my friends called, but what sympathy can another 11 year old share? How were any of us expected to cope with this?

I went to my room again eventually. I shut the closet doors on my Barbie's. I never played with them again. I sat on my bed and I looked at the guardian angel portrait that hung above my bed and I asked God "Why?" 

11 years and 8 years.... Hard to imagine that as I look at my own children. 11 years and 8 years and they were gone from this Earth. They were on their way to church. Less than a five mile drive from their home. The drunk driver that killed them was less than a half a mile from his home. LESS than a half a mile... And you know, as angry as I still am, I can't help but think that he was a young life, too. Younger than I am now... I don't know him, but I can't fathom that he could ever forget about the lives he extinguished. The community he ravaged.

It took a while but I eventually accepted that God's ways are not our own. God has a plan for every life. I wish I could have a Jimmy Stewart moment and see how different my own would be had it not been for Crystal. Had she lived it would have been so different. Had she never existed it would have been even more different. Her 11 years and her brother's 8 years meant something to me.

21 years and I still tear up thinking about them. 21 years and I still look back and wonder what might have been. 21 years and I believe, firmly, that they are waiting on me. They are in the arms of my Savior and they are waiting to greet me on the other side. I thank God for the 11 years that Crystal was in my life, including every slumber party and pizza hut trip and whispered secret in the dark of my room...and for the 8 years that CJ pestered us and begged us to play Nintendo baseball with him... even for that time that he whopped me in the head with a golf club when we were building forts in the woods. For every memory, I am truly grateful.

August 8 will be 21 years. 

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

1 Corinthians 1:3-4

Author's Note:

Last week a 10 year old girl and her 8 year old brother were killed along with their grandmother in a car accident near Tallahassee. They were from Thomasville, AL, which is just a hop over from where I live now. They were buried this weekend. Their father buried his children and his mother. The city of Thomasville was devastated by this tragedy. 

Alas, life goes on...the Thomasville schools started back today. I have thought about them all day. I am praying for the children as they adjust to life without their friends. I am praying for that father and his wife as they learn to live without their children. It took our little community years to repair our hearts from our tragic loss. I know what they are going through and so I pray even harder for their comfort.

Thanks to VBS

We start Vacation Bible School tomorrow night. It's a big deal. Maybe it's just a big deal in the south, but since that's all I've ever known, it's a BIG deal. I'm teaching the 4,5, and 6 year olds. I'm positive that they are going to have questions that stump me. I'm sure that they're probably going to teach me a lot more than I can teach them. They're still in that innocent, almost untouched, child of God stage. They're sweet but they are extremely curious.

Bible schools, like just about everything else, have gotten much more extravagant than they used to be. It's all fun. It brings in more kids. The more extravagant that your VBS is the more children that will attend. "Did you hear that (fill in the blank) Church is having a bouncy slide on Tuesday? Did you hear that every kid gets a free toy and a t-shirt?" 

Some of the bigger churches are even more extravagant... if that's possible. And that's fine. If it brings children to God I am all for it. I can't help but worry that the message of God gets lost in all of the extravagance. Are the children really seeing the saving grace of God beneath the Bouncy House and the Pizza Hut nights? I truly pray that they are.

We didn't have anything like that when I was little. I guess it doesn't matter if it's extravagant or simple. If the church members that lead it are like minded in the teachings of Christ then God is going to show up and He will move those children in the way He wants them to be. 

I was pondering all of this tonight. I was hanging my paper parrots and lanterns and stapling palm trees to the wall tonight and I couldn't help but to reflect back to the Bible schools of my youth. They were simple but they were effective. We had fun and we learned about Jesus.

We didn't go on many big trips when I was little. We had a big family and vacations were expensive. Most of my summer days were spent outside. It was hot outside. We rode bikes, built forts, worked in the gardens. Two or three days a week (on a good week) we drove 20 minutes to the pool that we were members at and we swam. Vacation Bible School was a break in the summer monotony. I looked forward to it. It was always in the morning, 8 or 8:30. It lasted until just before lunch. It was the break in my summer where I saw a lot of my school friends. It was exciting.

The schedule was always the same for all the years I was a part of Bible School. We had group assembly. We lined up outside the church. If you were lucky you got picked to hold one of the flags or the Bible. If not, you followed behind the lucky ones and marched into your class's designated pew. We pledged the American Flag, the Christian flag, and the Bible. We prayed together. We sang songs. We had a mission story. We prayed again. We were dismissed to our classrooms. 

Our teachers taught us memory verses, gave us gold stars for bringing our bibles, taught us bible stories, and let us do crafts. We went to the fellowship hall for cheap cream filled cookies and red or purple kool-aid. The older ladies of the church always served the snack and you could always convince one of them to give you extra cookies or Cheetos. We had outside time and, there, we played "Duck Duck Goose" and "Drop the Handkerchief" and the ever popular "Red Rover". It was simple, but it was fun (it was also insanely competitive).

When our parents picked us up we were hot, tired, and hungry. We had to practice our memory verses so that we could get a star the next day for reciting it back to our teacher. Five stars meant we got a prize on Friday. Friday was our fun day, we had games and usually balloons, sometimes water guns. It was fun. It wasn't fancy or high tech. It was full of love and dedicated Christian adults (mostly women) who gave up their time and money to teach children about Jesus.

The VBS that I'm privileged to teach this year is also simple. It's just like the ones I grew up going to. There are a few dedicated teachers that put time and effort into teaching children about the love of Jesus. We don't have huge light and sound shows, we don't have bouncy house fun night. We have fun, fellowship, and we will teach your child about Jesus. 

I was saved at Vacation Bible School when I was 9 years old. I will never forget how happy I was that day. Those wonderful teachers and the pastor at Beulah Baptist Church led me to Christ. Bible school is important. As I prayed for our week with other workers tonight I couldn't help but remember that day that I walked down to my pastor at Bible school. I was so excited to tell my parents when they picked me up. I wanted to tell the world about my new salvation. I was a new person, a saved person, thanks to Bible School.

Now, as I strive to teach the children that are in my class this week, I will remember every sweet lady that taught me as a child. I appreciate your sacrifice now. I know you had a hundred things to do, but, you put it all aside to come to the church and teach me about Jesus. Thank you. Thank you.... And thank God for Vacation Bible School.

"Then Jesus said, "Leave the children alone and don't keep them from coming to Me, because the Kingdom of Heaven is made up of people like this."

Matthew 19:14 HCSB